She stood before him. Tears dripping down her cheek, slowing as they passed her lips, and finally dropping one by one to the floor. Each tear representing intense passion and pain for a loss of something that she never fully had in the first place.
His glance back at her was blank. No expression. No thoughts appeared to be stirring in his head. He just stood there.
She waited. For what seemed an eternity, she waited for him to say something magical. Something brilliant. Something that would fix everything that had gone wrong. But his lips did not part. The silence continued.
Shaking her head, her mind filled with a multitude of emotions. Anger, sadness, and determination overwhelmed her. She did not want to walk away, yet at the same time she wanted to run as far away as she could. She did not want this to end, yet she wanted the frustration to go away. She felt she had no choice. There was an emptiness about him that remained despite the lingering hours they spent talking, touching, laughing, crying. The emptiness was something she simply couldn't fill. She was beginning to wonder if anyone could.
Memories passed before her as she stood sobbing. Thoughts of embracing at his doorstep when they made up from a fight. Memories of laughing so hard they cried over shared joys. Passionate glances towards one another as they partook of each other. Remembering the exact place on his chest where she would lay her head as they discussed life's lessons and oddities.
Her thoughts quickly turned back to reality as she felt him grab her hand and hold it tight. He looked at her with a sadness that made her want to weep harder. His eyes welled up as he looked at her. But all he could do was speak words he had spoken so many times before. He had nothing new to offer her. He had no words of wisdom to reassure her. He had no actions to display for her. He simply told her he loved her.
It was not enough. She waited her entire life for the one man who would not only love her, but understand her, respect her, support her. A man that would fight for their love.
Perhaps she wanted too much. Perhaps her search would continue in relentless pursuit. Only to find disappointment after disappointment.
But the haunting thoughts that kept playing in her head convinced her otherwise. She could not be alone. Someone shared her passions and desires in every way. There had to be someone like her that found life's pains to be almost unbearable, and yet worth every moment because life's joys were pure euphoria. Someone that was not afraid to search out life with her in the most vulnerable way. In a way that only they would understand. In a journey only they could share together. One that would be challenging to face, but full of the most promising pleasure imaginable. She had naively hoped it was the man standing in front of her.
She looked over at her love. The man that brought her so much joy, and so much pain. The man that she shared her most vulnerable moments with. Her most proud moments. Her fears and doubts and jealousies. Her body and soul. But it was too often not returned. She couldn't continue to give of herself in this way a moment more.
"It's time to go," she whispered quietly in his ear. She picked up her things and slowly walked out the door. She glanced back as she walked, holding on to one last hope....a hope that he would come to her and finally give himself to her in every way. She knew the result before she even looked. He would not follow.
And she was right.
